Putting the Hump in Humpday: Here's to Javier Bardem's body of work; and well, his body.

There's only one man who could get away with saying, "Usted va me deja tener mi manera con usted porque soy el hombre más caliente vivo." (You're going to let me have my way with you because I'm the hottest man alive), and that man is Javier Bardem. He's never said that to me, but only because it goes without saying. Because it's only delaying the inevitable so let's just get to it, shall we? The humpday post, I mean.

In 2004, I saw the movie "Mar Adentro" (The Sea Inside); based on the real-life story of Ramón Sampedro, a Spanish ship mechanic left quadriplegic after a diving accident, who fought a 28-year campaign in support of euthanasia and his right to end his own life. I fell for Javier Bardem immediately because of his stellar performance in this movie. Yes, it was his ACTING that got me. Seriously. No, really. This is proven by the fact that for most of the movie he looked like this:


Javier Bardem as Ramón Sampedro. An old man with kind eyes, totally huggable in that sweater; but definitely not sexy.


I was captivated by him right away, and made a mental note to rent some of his other films. I thought, "He's old so he must have a ton of movies under his belt". Keep in mind that this was 2004, before everyone on the planet knew him by name, or by face for that matter. When the flashback scene of the diving accident came on, showing what Javier Bardem REALLY looked like (and what was supposed to be Sampedro's character as a young man), I just about lost my mind. You crazy film industry makeup departments! You tricked me! This man is actually smokin' hot in real life, and for about 5 minutes in this movie they let him show it:


Since I couldn't find the diving scene on YouTube, I opted for this shot from the movie's official website. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have some screen licking to do. HEY-OHHH!


That was how my Javier fixation appreciation began. A few months ago, I finally decided to watch every JB movie I hadn't already seen. I looked up his "resume", which to my delight reads mostly like details from a steamy novel:


Click to enlarge. As you can see by the numbers, I cut out the films that didn't fit in with the sexy theme (for illustrative purposes only. I did WATCH the movies that were without sexy titles in addition to these!) They're all a pretty stunning testament to "taking your work home with you". Rather, taking HIS work home with ME. The only one of this list I haven't seen yet (because Netflix doesn't have it) is "Jamon, Jamon", which directly translated is "Ham, Ham". Judging by the 18 & over trailer I found on YouTube, it might as well be called "Pork, Pork". No joke. I won't link to it here but do the search on YouTube and find out for yourself. Also no joke? Me, seeing that movie, even if I have to buy it.


One of my photography teachers adopted a saying that has stuck with me since college: "When your work speaks for itself, don't interrupt". I have been delaying this Hump of the Month post not only so I could watch as many Javier Bardem movies as possible (you know, for research purposes; I'm nothing if not thorough!) but also because I wanted it to be all-encompassing. I wanted it to do Javier's superb "body of work" equally as much justice as I wanted to "do justice" to his "superb body"; if you know what I'm sayin' and I think you do.

In addition, I wanted this to be informative, not a fluff piece meant only for people to drool all over their keyboards while staring at photos like this one:


I would roll around in hot cigar ashes with him anytime.


At one point I even told a friend that I wanted to do a synopsis and review of all 20 JB movies I've seen, but I'm pretty sure I made that insane declaration in the middle of watching his thriller, Between Your Legs; and by the end of that movie--with it's jaw-droppingly shocking twist-- I realized that I was a FOOL to think I could easily sum up the complexity that is Javier and his chameleon-like acting. My summation for each of his movies, without going into great detail, would sound something like this: "He blows away the competition, you should definitely see everything he's ever been in. While you're doing that, I'm going to be over here licking my TV. Look away, look away I tell you!"; and that's just not helpful to anybody. Since his work speaks for itself, who am I to interrupt?


He deserved winning the Oscar for his performance in No Country for Old Men. Don't watch it at 7a.m. on a lazy Saturday like I did, though. It's a little too early in the day for that kind of murderous rampaging.


So, if you'll go to my I JUST WATCHED... section in the right side bar, you'll see the hotlinks to 10 of the 15 recently viewed JB films, all of which I loved, albeit in different ways. It has been really interesting to see his movies in order of their release date, and also to confirm that he is a really great actor and not just a pretty face with a hot body and an intoxicating accent to boot (universe, if you're listening, please send him to my doorstep ASAP). He has done such a variety of work and really commits to his character that it was never boring. Even if it had been, his looks would save him; but he never has to rely on that. There's just not a downside to watching the work of someone who qualifies as The Hump of the Month, trust me. Some of you aren't big on the subtitles thing, and to that I say, SCREW THE SUBTITLES, HE'S HOT, WATCH HIM ANYWAY he is in plenty of english-language movies, so check those out.


UGH, her again? She needs to back off of my man before I unleash the motherf**king moonwalk! He's obviously pointing to the exit and telling her to go far, far away.


If you have a new-favorite-actor based on only seeing a few of their movies, I highly recommend immersing yourself in their work. Start at the beginning, see their evolution, watch their growth through experience. In the meantime, there's always April's Hump of the Month to enjoy, Javier Bardem. I plan to enjoy him for a LONG time.

Click HERE to watch The Sea Inside's trailer, featuring the diving scene that made me realize that Javier Bardem wasn't really an old man in a huggable sweater as the rest of the movie would suggest. In all seriousness, this movie is in my top 10 favorites of all time; and this man is in my top 3 favorite humps of all time. He might even be Numero Uno, but don't tell Jeremy.


Red and purple are my favorite colors, he'd look PERFECT in my bedroom.



To read previous Putting the Hump in Humpday posts, click HERE and scroll down.

Viva la Free Download!

Last week I got Nine Inch Nail's latest single as a free download through the official NIN website. Today, and today only, Coldplay is offering the new single, Violet Hill, for free as well. Get it HERE, under "song". I hope more artists continue this trend.


Don't click on this image, click on the hotlink above.

That's the last time THESE two party together!

I have a hunch that just before the injury, Ms. Temple was heard yelling, "Lindsay, stop ordering me around... and put down that claw-cracker! How many times do I have to say I'M NOT A LOBSTER, you idiot!"

Meanwhile, somewhere in Hollywood, Rebecca De Mornay is getting felt up by painted ladies*

Tom Cruise did a great job convincing everyone he was batsh*t crazy after jumping on Oprah's couch in 2005, and I was among those taking bets on what his comedown would be like. After Suri was born, I did the calculations (counting backwards on my fingers), and it's possible that he was amped because he just found out Katie was knocked up, which they had to keep secret. Even though he was on Oprah 10 months earlier, it's still possible. Right? What does anyone do when they have to keep an exciting secret to themselves? Jump on Oprah's couch and act insane enough to scare a worldwide audience of millions, duh! Anyway, it looks like he's going back on her show in May to celebrate the 25 year anniversary of Risky Business.




I hastily (because time is money as Lana would probably say) threw together this photoshop collage to show my prediction of what his upcoming appearance will look like. I can only hope that during the actual show, Bob Seger will be singing "Old Time Rock 'n Roll" from the side of the stage:


Don't try to take him to a disco, indeed.

...

*The headline of this post might be funny (or not!), but it's no joke. See?


Oh Becky, there really is no excuse for this.

You are, literally, the sunshine of my life

A Ben Sunshine-y day in Puerto Rico

Happy Birthday, Benny!
I don't know why it took 26 years for our lives to intersect, but it did. I heard about and saw photos of you for several years before we actually met, though. Your devoted "bowling wife" had so many stories to tell, and ended each one by telling me how much I would just love love love you when she introduced us.


A Sunshine & a Shoni

Luckily, we finally did get to meet during one of my trips back to NYC way back when. When planning my visit, Shoni insisted that no matter what night of the week I flew in on, I couldn't leave until Monday so that I would get to go to Sunday night bowling at Chelsea Piers. We clicked immediately, and I'm so happy to have had you in my life for all of this time (thanks, Shoni!)!


Check out the color of your tongue! Wonder how it got so red? (Looks like blurry-faced Eric is wondering the same!)


Ahh, here is the source of the red tongue!


Photographic evidence of the best New Year's Eve thus far, and I'm not just saying that because Dr. Jason's ass is resting in my hands (which it has an open invitation to do any day of the year).

Thoughts of you are of the kindest and most open person on the planet. Thoughts of the kindest and most open person on the planet are of YOU. You're it. It's you. There is an unmistakable warmth about you that cannot be duplicated. People have tried and failed, believe me. I have met the impostors, and they will never get it right no matter how hard they try.


Your bowling wife, her boyfriend Chris (Wait a minute! How did she get so lucky? She can't just go around claiming all the best men! Well, at least she shares), me and you; at Barrage, NYC.

She was right about love love loving you, I really do. I'm not alone in that, though, since everyone who meets you feels the same way. Truthfully, we're all just a bunch of planets revolving around you, Mr. Sunshine. YOU ARE YOUR NAME! xoxoxo

Proof that the ability to HOLD your liquor is not in direct relation to the size of your mitts

Jessica Simpson could show a lot of jazz with those hands.

Weekend Girl Talk, Part 4: Even our years researching Chaos Theory* couldn't prepare us for this depth of scientific analysis

The fact that I had a 2:30 a.m. debate on the lyrics to a certain song currently being played ad nauseum on every radio station and cable music channel should tell you what kind of weekend** I had.

Me: The lyrics to that song are NOT "Let me rub my face all around your waist". I'm pretty sure she says something about wrapping her thighs around his waist... though I will admit that after hearing it a million times, it DOES start to sound like she wants to rub her face in that general area. From now on I will be singing it your way, especially when the car windows are open at crowded intersections.

JC: Nice! There's nothing I hear in the lyrics about her wrapping her thighs around anything, though. It's definitely all about her FACE and where she plans on rubbing it.

Me: Do you actually think that woman rubs her face in or around anybody's lower region? She probably has someone on her payroll take care of those specific duties on her behalf; she will not mess up her hair & makeup for that. Have you forgotten that she's an original certified VH-1 Diva, circa '88?


JC: Really listen to it though! {cranking the volume and proceeding to break down the song for me like our lives depend on it} See, she wants someone to touch her body so she can then rub her face all up on his waist, which as far as I'm concerned is the natural progression of things, anyway. You know I'm right about this.

Me: This woman hits nearly inaudible high notes, which seem to be directly related to pressing a magic button inside of her left ear***, for a living. She probably spends millions preserving her throat with industrial humidifiers in hermeticially sealed rooms. The only thing she's rubbing her face all up on are butterflies made out of sparkly diamonds.

*Whoever figures out the connection to the singer in question and chaos theory in the comments is the gold-star reader of the day.

**My favorite kind, of course. I mean, hello? There was a 2:30 a.m. debate on song lyrics!

***You have to click on that hotlink and witness the hard work someone put into cutting together clips of the aforementioned high notes. It's truly a masterpiece. Warning: If your computer speakers are anywhere near a window, you better make sure it's made of shatter-proof glass.


Want more Weekend Girl Talk? Here's PART 1, PART 2 and PART 3.

For everyone (and everyone you know) who has a dog in Milwaukee... this one's for you!

Awhile back, I came to the end of a long process of growing out my hair to donate to Locks of Love. The minimum required for a donation is a 10" tip-to-tip ponytail, which is a lot of hair to chop all at once. Since I didn't want to end up bald, I knew I had to take someone with me who I could trust to ensure that my head wouldn't end up as somebody's "special art project".

I knew immediately my friend of 20 years, Sue, would be up to the task, and she came along happily. Just before the scissor-wielding stylist started the first sawing actions through my thick ponytail, Sue unexpectedly whipped out a ruler and measured several times to confirm it was the right length, because as much as she knows that donating hair for kids with medical hair loss is a great cause, she also knows that I don't ever want to look like a dude.

There isn't anyone I trust more with my hair and more importantly, with my life. The point of this post is to announce that after many years of dreaming about it, she has started her own professional* dog walking service, and she'd love to add your pet(s) to her important client list! It goes without saying that if I had a dog and lived in Wisconsin, I would hire her in a heartbeat.

Click HERE to get to her website. Please pass along this information to every dog-owner you know in and around the Milwaukee area, suburbs included!




*She's professional, which takes the pressure off of your dog.

You're STILL putting the Grrrrr...

in Swinger!

Finally! A product Meatloaf & Tiffany won't endorse*

My old friend Taj (you may recall her being the "Britney" to my "Madonna", without all the tongue) is back on the grid after some time away, which is excellent news.

Disclaimer: The "Taj Wanders" link below is not for the easily offended or those without a sense of humor, but if you've been reading HOJ for any amount of time, that doesn't apply to you. Therefore, it's not for those of you with a boss or children nearby. You have been warned:

It might be a joke commercial but whoever came up with this product sure tackled a very specific problem.


*Unless, of course, the money is really good.

Nude, pissed

Don't say you already knew this song and didn't bother to tell me about it.

I like Radiohead but have never seen them live, so if you're a super-fan don't take this wrong because it's the highest compliment I can pay: This song is the closest thing I've heard to Jeff Buckley since Jeff Buckley.

Double click either play arrow if you have trouble with the video:

Heart-stoppingly beautiful. They've been performing Nude in concert since 1997, but the recent In Rainbows is the first time they committed it to an album.


P.S. Alicia, I'm going through my Buckley stuff this weekend! For reals!

Pouring honey from a jar, any car in front of me when I'm in a hurry, the current administration coming to an end

What do all of those things have in common with April's Hump of the Month post? The progression is much slower than anyone would like. It's too bad all of these things can't balance themselves out with the supersonic speed at which the past few days have kicked my ass unleashed the motherf**king moonwalk on me. My head is spinning, mostly because of my 11th hour tax adventure on Monday night, which I will not get into because I'm fresh out of vodka.

So, I'm putting Javier's Humpday off to avoid a hastily-written post that doesn't do him justice, because he deserves better than that. This way I can watch the other 2 Bardem movies that just arrived in my mailbox, which will allow for a more informed opinion on his hotness acting. It will also allow the shoulders that used to be at the base of my neck to (maybe, possibly, hopefully?) drop down from the top of my head.

Because it's not my style to leave you high & dry, here's a little somethin'-somethin' that can best explain why sometimes slow & easy is better:


Awww yeah. I'm talking to you, Bardem.

So you can prepare yourselves for Wednesday

Think of today's post as the warm-up (pun intended) for tomorrow's Hump of the Month post featuring my boyfriend, the SMOKIN' HOT Javier Bardem* (Mr. Leather-Smoke-and-Berries himself!); which I have been doing research on forever. You can see proof of that if you scroll down the page to my I JUST WATCHED... section in the sidebar. I have Netflix'd Javier movie after Javier movie (7 so far, not including the ones I've already seen him in), and I still have 3 more coming my way. Most of these movies feature him all sexy and manly and speaking español; showcasing his best features... and if you don't already know which features are his best ones, they are: ALL OF THEM. 

In short, it has been torturous to put myself through these long hours of watching him on my TV, in addition to all the quality time we spend together when he comes over, but it is the length to which I dedicate myself to the Humpday post every month. I do it for you. You're welcome.

So, in that same theme of hot international heat; here is a 3-minute video of someone eating a Bhut Jolokia chili from India, which is the world's hottest pepper. You have to watch this until the end (there's no puking!). His running dialogue and vivid descriptions are cringe-worthy and hilarious (but mostly cringe-worthy). This dude has balls and a sense of humor; neither of which do him any good when the world's hottest pepper unleashes the motherf**king moonwalk:


Double click on either play arrow if you have trouble with the video.

You should now be prepared for the hotness that will be tomorrow's "Putting the Hump in Humpday" post.

*Don't feel the need to mention fish-face's Penelope Cruz's supposed involvement with my boyfriend. I know the press makes it seem like she's dating Javier, but this is a lie perpetuated merely to sell movie tickets. It's sad, really.

Meatloaf would do anything for money (but he won't do that). Oh wait, yes he will.

Disclaimer Caveat: Even though it was released in 1977, Meatloaf's Paradise by the Dashboard Light is a classic for the ages. You cannot argue this point with me and win.

More than 30 years after it's release, Paradise by the Dashboard Light is still being played on every college campus in the country. It was certainly played at every party or bar I went to in college, and each time it came on, my friends and I were suddenly in our own musical. Everything-- beer pong, keg stands, a table full of people playing the card game affectionately known as A-hole, the guitar-playing dudes on the front steps--would stop, and we would all wholeheartedly sing along*. Even the burly, stoic guys who never sang joined in loudly; which makes sense if you go by the increased beer consumption=increased volume of sound equation. Afterwards, with no mention of the buzzed chorus we were all apparently members of, regular party activity would ramp-up again. Me? I was probably getting back to kicking ass at speed quarters.

Now that you understand the degree to which this particular song is ingrained in my college experience, you can understand why I received no less than 12 e-mails over the weekend from some of those friends in response to and concurrence with my horror at seeing this commercial:


Double-click on either 'play' arrow if you have trouble with the video

Part of my job is coming up with marketing ideas and advertising pitches, so I realize that I analyze commercials (and ok, lots of things) more than the average bear. I will start you off with these points to ponder:

1) They cast 80's pop singer Tiffany as the mom who can stock a garage refrigerator (with french bread?!) and then release a dove from her bare hands that she magically pulled out of thin air (after a prayer?!). The dove flies out of view never to be seen again, which is probably supposed to represent how quickly time passes, or something equally depressing. All I know is when I first saw that part of the commercial, I actually thought to myself, "This right here? THIS is what it sounds like when doves cry."

2) In a glorious display of a textbook mood swing, we find out that if Meatloaf gets "crazed", he'll angrily throw a fireball into a trash can. Then, he'll tell you he's going to buy you something.

3) The script calls for the teenager to grab nothing out of thin air TWICE and eat it. This thin-air thing must come from his mom's DNA. Maybe originally he was supposed to eat flying doves but they thought it would distract from the message, which ends up coming through regardless. The message is that Meatloaf needs cash and will seemingly do anything to get it.

4) Unless you're selling dynamite, having the featured product EXPLODE at the end of the commercial might not be the best thing to leave in the mind of the potential customer.

5) For me, the most disturbing part of this commercial is the song choice. If you don't already know or never thought about it before, Paradise by the Dashboard Light (like all Jim Steinman songs) is a massive and over-the-top saga of teenage sex in a car-turned-miserable marriage that goes like this (and because Tiffany's flying dove reminded me that time is fleeting, I opted to edit down the mass of information found on Wikipedia instead of typing up my own run-down):

Part one, Paradise Reminiscing their days as a high school couple, making out in the front seat of a car. "And now our bodies are oh so close and tight/It never felt so good it never felt so right..." As the song progresses it's clear that the boy has more on his mind. "Baby don't you hear my heart/You've got it drowning out the radio/I've been waiting so long for you to come along and have some fun/And I gotta let you know, no you're never gonna regret it/So open up your eyes I've got a big surprise, it'll feel all right/ I wanna make your motor run". 

Part two, Let Me Sleep On It The girl refuses to go any further unless the boy promises that he will love her, marry her, and stay faithful. The boy is conflicted and says he'll tell her in the morning, which doesn't get him very far. "I couldn't take it any longer/ Lord, I was crazed / When the feeling came upon me like a tidal wave / Started swearing to my God/ And on my mother's grave/ That I would love you till the end of time / I swore I would love you till the end of time"

Part three, Praying For The End Of Time Things snap back to the present time. They are sticking to their vows, despite being miserable about it. "So now I'm praying for the end of time / To hurry up and arrive / 'cause if I got to spend another minute with you I don't think that I can really survive/ I'll never break my promise / Or forget my vow / But God only knows what I can do right now/ I'm praying for the end of time / It's all that I can do! / Praying for the end of time / So I can end my time with you!"

Now I ask you...will the debased version of this song sell phones to parents of teenagers? The same teenagers who after having borrowed the car, may just ignore that ringing phone as they participate in their own paradise by the dashboard "Go-Phone" light?

...

*I have the exact same kind of flashbacks when I hear Hootie & the Blowfish's Hold My Hand or Only Wanna Be With You. I realize to some of you that admission might blow my credibility on the topic of 'classics', but those WERE The Hootie Years, so I have no shame about that. Besides, I defy you to find a song with a sweetly-appropriate lyrical summation of college relationships that tops, "Maybe we can't change the world but I'm gonna love you the best that, the best that I can."

Well, besides this obvious choice!

Unleash the Motherf**king Moonwalk!

I found this spoof on the Ad Council "Parental Guide" posters and knew it would be the perfect thing to carry you through the rest of your workday and into the weekend. Even if you don't have any kids you will enjoy it, as evidenced by the fact that I laughed for probably MUCH longer than the average stressed-out parent. Or maybe because I'm not a stressed-out parent, I laughed at this. Either way, I laughed and I hope you will, too:


Click for maximum enjoyment.


While we're on this subject, here is proof those clever Brits can also think up new ways to get old messages across:

Here's a tip... try counting out loud (even if you have to do it under your breath).

You're welcome! Now get out there and unleash the motherf**king moonwalk!

Source of brilliant motherf**king moonwalk unleashment.

Oh, the irony!

One year ago today I wrote my first House of Jules post. I wanted to kick things off in a fitting way, so I thought about it for a few minutes before deciding to give a little nod in the direction of MTV and the first of their music video transmissions with help from The Buggles, Video Killed the Radio Star:


Remember when MTV played music videos? Well, that's where my first post title came from.

Music videos on MTV are a thing of the past, which is a tired complaint and one I won't add to because if those pesky videos hadn't eventually gotten out of the way, I would not have gotten sucked into Laguna Beach a few years ago, which led me to the even juicier show, The Hills.

Of course people have their equally tired complaints about The Hills, saying that it's not a REAL reality show (which isn't a valid complaint! If you want "all-reality all the time", you wouldn't be turning on your TV). These are the same adults who probably think that music videos should be live performances, which I figured out was NOT the case 55 seconds into this truly horrible video (during the first week of MTV's initial reign). I have a vivid memory of thinking, "Heyyyyyy, this isn't live! There's no way to hear her singing over that chugging engine." You have to cut me some slack about this because: 1) I was 8 years old, and 2) it was the dawn of music videos, these things weren't so embedded in our culture in 1981.

Anyway, back to my blog-iversary. The irony of a music video channel no longer playing music videos, which is now known for airing reality shows that aren't REAL, falls right in line with the irony that the traditional gift for a first anniversary is PAPER, and if there is something I haven't needed since I started writing in this public forum, paper would be it.



Did the "M"-shaped mystery meat freak anyone else out when these promos first aired or was it just the 8-year old me?


Seriously though, thanks for continuing to come back to the H.o.J., I'm happy you're here!

Better LATE than pregnant!

I'm known for things like my long-established love connection with Jeremy Piven, saving the day with my knowledge of pop culture trivia, being a smart-ass (in the good way. Think of me as the smart-ass with a heart of gold!), and my adoration for funny men with foreign accents.

**Click HERE to find out what I'm not exactly PROUD of being known for. It's a good thing my family loves me anyway!**

...

"Hey hey, it's another giveaway" alert:
While you're clicking away, my sister is having a contest to give away 3 copies of her book, Remembering Ruby, which was published last year! She wrote it, and I designed the cover (and her matching blog header)! Click HERE for all of the exciting details!

He'll be on my mind every time I hear that theme song

I've mentioned my fandom (is that a word?) for the British version of The Office; and in truth I resisted the U.S. version for most of the first season it aired. This is because of my love for and loyalty to Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant (and Karl Pilkington, for that matter... if you are into funny Brits and haven't heard their podcasts, you've been missing out). Eventually I gave in, mostly due to the urging of my 15-year old nephew D., who would always ask if I was watching it so we could share one of those, "Wasn't that funny?" moments that our family enjoys so much. Ever since then I've been a dedicated Thursday night watcher.

I have a Pavlovian response to the theme song. Thankfully I don't drool like Pavlov's dog, but as soon as the theme song starts, my heart beats a little faster, my grin gets ridiculous, and I can't help but bop my head along with the tune. It's uncontrollable. What happens AFTER the theme song (the actual show part of the show) has always been good, so the theme makes me giddy with anticipation of the laughter that is sure to come.

This past Thursday, they dedicated the show to Nathan Robinson, and rolled this video of him playing that theme song on piano:


(Double click on either 'play' arrow if you have trouble with the video)

It didn't take long to track down the rest of the story, which I'll have you know, made me cry.

From the Boston Globe:
Nathan Alden Robinson loved music. His first instrument was a Casio toy keyboard, his family said, and Nathan loved to listen to a preprogrammed version of Beethoven's "Für Elise." "He said, 'So Daddy, can you teach me how to play?' " said his father, Donald Robinson, a professional musician. "I found a simple arrangement and he learned to play it by rote." Nathan, a 15-year-old freshman at Newton North High School, continued to play the piano, and later the clarinet, every day until just before his death Friday of methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus, pneumonia, and influenza at Children's Hospital Boston.

"Every morning he would get up at 6:10, get dressed, have his cereal, and at 6:30 he would sit down and play the piano; you could set your watch by it," his father said. A few weeks before his death, Nathan was at a friend's house, and the two were talking about "The Office," their favorite television show. Nathan's friend suggested he play the theme music to the program, so Nathan looked online for the sheet music. Nathan mastered the song almost instantly, and his impromptu performance was filmed and posted on YouTube.

His parents said Nathan cared genuinely about how others were treated and could form instant bonds with people, regardless of age. "He was a good person," his father said. "He didn't like to see people picked on. He had great empathy. He'd get very upset when he'd see people be mean to one another." When he wasn't playing the piano, Nathan loved to write. For the last few years, he had been privately working on a book. He had completed 90 pages; Nathan's parents say they don't plan to read the work-in-progress out of respect for his privacy.

Most of you know about my good friend Nic, who is still in the ICU and is fighting her way through not only brain cancer but also the one-two punch of a staph infection AND spinal meningitis (among other hurdles); who has been on a respirator for 3 weeks, keeping us all on a surreal roller coaster ride that trust me, you don't want to be on. Against all odds, she opened her eyes a little bit and squeezed her husband's hand for the first time a couple of days ago; and although she hasn't been very responsive since then, we hope it's because she's storing up her energy to continue kicking the ass of everything her immune system is up against.

My point in writing that is to update those of you who were so great about sending her positive energy & keeping her in your thoughts (especially those of you in the Cherry Icee Coalition!). I'm so happy that she's being thought of, even by people who have never met her; who aren't fortunate enough to know first hand what a fantastic person she is.

The people who loved Nathan Robinson must have been so touched to know that because of an extremely thoughtful and generous decision by someone at NBC/The Office to run that piano-playing video of him at the end of the show, millions of people were going to know more about what a special person Nathan was... And isn't that what any of us would want when we are afraid of losing someone we love... taking comfort in the knowledge that even for a minute, lots of other people had an opportunity to have known them just a little bit, too?

The "King in the Castle Courtroom" dodges another lawsuit bullet! High-five!

Click to enlarge.

Click HERE to read the New York Times article.

If I had a dollar for every time I was "randomly accosted and touched" when I lived in New York City--or here in Chicago, for that matter-- I'd be loaded...and I mean that in the financial, not the inebriated sense! A short ride on the subway during rush hour will guarantee a very specific kind of physical intimacy with strangers that in nearly any other time and place would be wholly inappropriate unless you had dinner together first. I have stories for days of the many strange and personal-space-violating experiences on the subway: like the time that a seemingly-blind panhandler was feeling her way through the crowded N train, and then tried to feel her way through my purse. I yanked it back, and she screamed "B**CH!!!!" in my ear for awhile. When someone else helped her to move along, she sweetly sung, "You smell good!" as she stroked my hair. Maybe a better illustration of special city closeness would be the time a Wall Street-type squeezed himself into the already sardine-packed E train and since he couldn't reach a pole or overhead bar to hang on to, he just grabbed me around the waist until he could maneuver himself towards something made of metal that was actually bolted into the floor. Seriously.

When my sister & I saw Borat, we were disgusted and horrified by the vulgarity of the "humor"... which of course means that we loved it. Sure, when it was over I turned to her and said, "Any innocence I had before this movie began is now gone, and I am forever scarred from this disturbing experience" but I said it in between bursts of laughing so hard I was crying. The very next night she took my brother-in-law to see it, though his opinion was a bit different than ours (we're used to that). 

I ended up buying Borat when it came out on DVD and had even more fun watching it with Charissa, who had yet to see it. Her reactions were priceless and could have been a spin-off slapstick comedy on their own merits. Mostly it was her saying, "This is so wrong!". Good times!

My point here is that not everyone thinks movies like this are funny, and not everyone agrees with the judge's ruling to dismiss this case (or any of the other eleventy-hundred that have been brought against the producers of the movie); but what was funny to ME about that 13-second scene this recent dismissed case involved was that the guy started running erratically down the sidewalk at top speed when Borat reached out to touch him. It was a totally unexpected reaction for the most part, unlike anything I've ever seen, which is exactly why I had such an appreciation for the entire movie. Stranger things happen to me (and I have seen stranger things happen to other people) than just random touching, and the reactions I've had (or have seen people have) never involved bobbing and weaving through the crowd. A punch in the face, maybe, but for the most part people just keep right on-a walking, which is one of the many reasons I love big, crowded cities. Absurd things happen all of the time, even when you're keeping your hands to yourself.

I couldn't find the sidewalk scene on YouTube, but this video has a bunch of other (what I think are) funny clips from the movie. Probably not something you should watch at work because if his accent doesn't get people's attention, your laughter (or gasps of horror, depending on your reaction) will:


Maybe because our dad has been running hotels for his entire professional career and we spent A LOT of time in them as kids, one of the scenes in this clip-fest that made my sister & I laugh the hardest (which starts 18 seconds from the beginning) is when Borat checks into a hotel, takes an elevator for the first time, gets in his crappy room and is so impressed with the fact that it has furniture in it that he sits down and says, "Wa Wa Wee Wah! King in the castle, King in the castle! I have a chair!"

Johnny Depp forgives me. Do you?

I am SO sorry to have inflicted a little April Foolery by Rickrolling you at the end of yesterday's post! If you don't already know what it means to "get Rickrolled", here is the explanation:

From the Wikipedia page on Rickrolling:

Rickrolling is an Internet meme involving Rick Astley's music video for his song "Never Gonna Give You Up". In a Rickroll, a person provides a link they claim is relevant to the topic at hand which actually takes the user to the Astley video. It can also mean playing the song loudly in public in order to be disruptive.

The practice began as a variant of an earlier prank called duckrolling, in which a link to a popular celebrity or news item would instead lead to a photoshopped picture of a duck with wheels. By May 2007, the practice had become widespread, and it eventually began to receive some coverage in the mainstream media.

In a March 2008 interview, Astley said that he will not try to capitalize on the rickroll phenomenon with a new recording or remix of his own, but that he'd be happy to have other artists remix it. Overall, Astley is fine with the phenomenon, although he finds it a little "bizarre" and only hopes that his daughter receives no embarrassment over it.

This whole Rickrolling thing has been floating around the internet for awhile now, and even when someone else has set ME up to get Rickrolled, I still think it's funny. Johnny Depp told me that he thinks it's funny, too.

No time to explain this unbelievable news!

First and most importantly, you saw my update to yesterday's Hollywud Connecshuns post, didn't you?! If not, CLICK HERE to see exclusive photos of a hot, sexy movie star who is a close, personal friend of H.o.J.! I'll give you a clue to ponder while you click: his name rhymes with Johnny Depp! Wait, was that too easy?

...

Now that you are up to speed on that (and probably drooling all over your keyboard), you're never going to believe the latest "I can't believe my luck" news. I don't have time for a long explanation right now, but you can CLICK HERE to be the first ones getting a sneak peek!