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Monday, October 8, 2007

The atomic number of selenium, and as of today, my age


1979. Those wings: took my mom forever to curl, and even more hairspray than you can possibly imagine to hold in place. I remember being VERY concerned that they would go flat before I got this picture taken. That dress: hideous, even then.


This was my favorite birthday gift of my entire childhood: The Hot Cycle "Green Machine", and I was the only kid on the block to have one. Even the boys were jealous, as you can see by the stance of Mr. Plaid Pants. Seeing this photo of me on my much-storied "Green Machine" will make Jen & Eric Cox laugh very hard, but that's another story for another day.


I can tell this is going to be a good year already because in the past 48 hours I've gone through 3 brand-new-to-me experiences. I'll blog about the other 2 when my 'visual aides' are completed, but here's one I can share with you now.

New Experience #1

I got this email from my future baby-daddy Todd (McMuffin) shortly after midnight:




Just after he answered in that southern drawl, I suddenly heard what I thought was static, and I figured the connection on our cell phones was bad. Here's how our conversation began:


Todd: "Hey, happy birthday, babe!"

Static/white noise/blowing sounds

Me: "Thank you! What is that sound? You there?"

louder blowing sounds

Todd: "I'M ON FIRE!"

the sound of a chair overturning

Me: "You're ON FIRE?"

I then realize the noise I think is a bad connection is actually Todd trying to extinguish the flames with his own breath.

Me: "Are you alright???"

more intense blowing, intermixed with that contagious laugh of his, sounding further away, because he has by this time set the phone down

Todd: "WHEW! Ok, baby. My sleeve was on fire. For a minute I thought I was going to be your own human birthday candle, but since I'm planning to jump out of a cake for your birthday, it's good to work these kinks out before the actual show."



It's going to be a very good year.

5 comments:

kat said...

I actually had to look up the atomic number of selenium to see how old you were or curiosity would've killed me instead of the cat. Not much older than me then. So HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

Also thanks for the blast from the past pics. Love you on the "green machine": You look stylish. In the red dress - not so much :)

Melisa Wells said...

Happy Birthday! Don't forget to check MY blog today...It's Julie day 'round the world!

Love, Me (no really, Love me! LOL)

Anonymous said...

Holy crap you're old. And what's up with the Chemistry shout-out? Eeewww. P.S. Nice to see some things haven't changed - meaning Todd still makes me cry. And are guests invited to this cake thing? I could be in Chicago for that . . . If he needs recommendations for background music for the show, I have some ideas.
P.P.S. HAPPY DAY YOU!!!

House of Jules said...

Thanks Kat & Missy! Yeah, that dress? I remember it being JCPenney brand and extremely itchy. The green dress I was wearing on my "Green Machine" was one of my favorites.

House of Jules said...

Nurse-Dr. Space Face: Thank you! I never pass up an opportunity to give Chem a shout-out! (and it comes in handy if you want people to work a little harder at figuring out your age, FYI.)

Yes, my baby-daddy is a hilarious and sick man, in all the best ways. Funny you should mention background music-- I even asked him what song he'd like me to play when I look out my peep-hole and see a big human-sized cake at my door, and his immediate/automatic suggestion was, "How about 'It's Raining Men?', which totally made me lose my shit. He is the funniest man alive, I think-- and I'll wrestle any person who disagrees.

Also, you know he loves an audience so of course guests are invited. You will have to be here to lead us all in the African Ant Eater ritual afterwards.

xoxo